April 5, 2011

How Are You? but I Don't Really Care

I am an optimist, but as most of us, there are days when I feel blue or upset or frustrated. I do not keep it all in and do not mind sharing it with other people and ask their advice. Hectic schedule, so many things to do, whether for work, study, family or with friends. Our lives have become extremely busy which in turn means that there is a lot more pressure to manage our time better, multi-task and utilize the 24 hours that we have.

What I do not understand is people who are always happy or at least say they are happy or that everything is going good every single time when you ask them. Frankly, I then just think, come on now, show some emotion and feel free to spill it out and show that you are human and that not always everything has to be great. I then begin to think that people either do not want to talk about what is really going on with them, at least to discuss it with me, or that their problems or concerns are not big enough to share with others. Or that they are simply the annoying bunch who always is happy with everything?Is it even possible?To me, it is not real.

When I ask someone How are you? or someone asks me, I do not take it as a greeting, but more as a genuine interest in what is going on in my life. So I tell what is going on, without sugar coding anything and most of the time, even when things do go good I like to mention a little more than just one word about it. I had a conversation with someone about this greeting, and I do get it that some people use it more as a substitute for hello, but then why not use hello or good morning instead if that is all you want to communicate to the other person?

I agree that there is no need to share too much info with those who you barely know or who you obviously does not care much, but showing some soft side or the real side and opening up would not hurt...After all, we have to be tough in so many things in life, can we just spare the How are you?? conversation and be as blunt as Dutch people about how we really are doing next time someone asks?

1 comment:

  1. Funny huh? I also like to give a real answer - i hope that's what people were expected when they asked me... In my reality, people do care about each other and don't make polite conversation for the sake of appearances only. But I know not everyone in the world feels this way! :) By the way, I wonder how people in countries such as Austria, Latvia, Hong Kong, and Malaysia for example, feel about the "How are you?" greeting? Hey world, how is it going?